Canoe, canoe?
This reminds me (every now and again, I do remember stuff) of the time, more than a
few years ago, still kidless, and the annual canoe trip was embarked upon. This was an annual event that about 6 or 8 couples did each year in early September. We used to hit Frankenmuth on a Friday nite and then head on up to the rifle river and throw those canoes in after a good breakfast in West Branch, and go all day long.
So, someone who... herein shall remain nameless...okay, it was the idiot typing this....decided that we should try a "branch of the river with less traffic"....and being a mapping expert, I pulled out the good old county map book available to anyone with an interest and plotted out a course which we were to take, that was "surely" going to keep us from being bothered by a bunch of boy scouts, making all kinds of racket, and we were....after all, out there to enjoy the quiet and peaceful trip down a beautiful river.....so (I'm gett'n to it...jist be patient....) we got out of the breakfast shop and it was raining very lightly....being September and warmer water times, we made a quick decision that the "weather would hold" and though we "tossed in the rain coats" we figured we wouldn't need them long....catch where I'm headed here???
Well, we found a state road, and tossed the canoes in, and assortment of beat up equipment had for a song by most including one wise guy who bought a fiberglass canoe for "next to nothin"....idiot.
We began to paddle along...and of course the rain, got heavier, and heavier, and as we went along with rain coats and poncho's doing a fair job of keepin us dry, we realized pretty quickly that a stream that had some fairly rapid water in it, would NOT enable a return trip should we decide that our decision processes were not up to standards that day....so we keep going. Several miles into this trip, we hit a long jam...requiring unloading and loading women, equipment brought along for the ride and manned the floats over the log jam only to find another one about two crooks down the stream....well the first crossing we were careful to stay on logs, which of course were now wet from rain and a bit tricky to mount....but on the second one, one of the not so agile guys said, "
%!%!@%, I might as well just jump in", and with that so did the others in an effort to speed up the portage process.....well, we lost count of the portages.....I think it was not very funny after the 7th or 8th one, I am not sure, since I was busy training my wife NOT to swing way....over to avoid sweepers since we had already learned that lesson very well once or twice already.
Long about portage 30 or 35, we began to look and see if we could perhaps pull out at one of the few cottages that dotted the banks, and walk SOMEWHERE...so long as we didn't have to paddle the boats, and course everyone was very tired of this scenic trip, and many new cuss words were slipping from lips, did I mention that one of the gals was 7 months pregnant?? I can still picture her legs stickin straight up after bowling over avoiding brush sweeps and not being able to right herself to a more dignified position. I of course knew that walking out on a strange road with a bunch of wet gear on, would not be whatcha say....kindly to your inner thighs....and pleaded to those more than a bit panicky, that even though it would be dark in about an hour...we should stay the course cause how much further could it be before we hit the main branch that we had hoped to hit hours before.....???
Well, after about a couple more portages, we finally hit the main stream...you would have thought we found Woodward avenue in a fog bank....hollars of pure joy were heard, as we steamed past those slowpoke boy scouts, and landed at the intended destination, where we had dropped off a ride.
Needless to say, we had a fair amount of discussion afterwords, and that night I was short significant cash as I felt compelled (Okay, extorted) into buying dinner for the bunch.
Strangely, the numbers signed up for the next fall, fell like a stone...and the whole party sort of disapated....
But I still have my canoe.....anybody game???