>> How true it is!!
>>
>>
>> NOAH
>> In the year 2009, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in
>> Australia , and said:
>> Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see
>> the end of all flash before me.
>>
>> Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few
>> good humans.
>>
>> He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: You have 6 months to build the
>> Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights.
>> Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his
>> yard - but no Ark.
>>
>> Noah! He roared, I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark ?
>> Forgive me, Lord, begged Noah, 'but things have changed.
>>
>> I needed a building permit.
>>
>> I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler
>> system.
>>
>> My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by
>> building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations.
>> We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.
>>
>> Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for
>> the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead
>> obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea.
>> I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear
>> nothing of it.
>>
>> Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local
>> trees in order to save the spotted owl.
>>
>> I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to
>> save the owls - but no go!
>>
>> When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me.
>> They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will.
>> They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel
>> and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.
>>
>> Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd
>> conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.
>> I'm still trying to resolve A complaint with the Human Rights
>> Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my
>> building crew.
>>
>> Immigration and Naturalization are checking the status of most of the
>> people who want to work.
>>
>> The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire
>> only Union workers with Ark-building experience.
>>
>> To make matters worse, the Tax Office seized all my assets, claiming
>> I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.
>>
>> So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to
>> finish this Ark.
>>
>> Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow
>> stretched across the sky.
>>
>> Noah looked up in wonder and asked,
>> 'You mean you're not going to destroy the world?'
>>
>> 'No,' said the Lord. 'The government beat me to it.
>>
>>
>> NOAH
>> In the year 2009, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in
>> Australia , and said:
>> Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see
>> the end of all flash before me.
>>
>> Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few
>> good humans.
>>
>> He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: You have 6 months to build the
>> Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights.
>> Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his
>> yard - but no Ark.
>>
>> Noah! He roared, I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark ?
>> Forgive me, Lord, begged Noah, 'but things have changed.
>>
>> I needed a building permit.
>>
>> I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler
>> system.
>>
>> My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by
>> building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations.
>> We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.
>>
>> Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for
>> the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead
>> obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark 's move to the sea.
>> I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear
>> nothing of it.
>>
>> Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local
>> trees in order to save the spotted owl.
>>
>> I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to
>> save the owls - but no go!
>>
>> When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me.
>> They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will.
>> They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel
>> and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.
>>
>> Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd
>> conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.
>> I'm still trying to resolve A complaint with the Human Rights
>> Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my
>> building crew.
>>
>> Immigration and Naturalization are checking the status of most of the
>> people who want to work.
>>
>> The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire
>> only Union workers with Ark-building experience.
>>
>> To make matters worse, the Tax Office seized all my assets, claiming
>> I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.
>>
>> So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to
>> finish this Ark.
>>
>> Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow
>> stretched across the sky.
>>
>> Noah looked up in wonder and asked,
>> 'You mean you're not going to destroy the world?'
>>
>> 'No,' said the Lord. 'The government beat me to it.
-Mezz