Announcement

[polarisrider1]

Polarisrider1 is clearing out the house. Just found out my 2nd oldest Cody (chevy guy) and His girlfriend Kala (snow bunny) are getting married in July. My 26 yr. old (polarisrules) finally got a real job and an apartment and has moved out last night while Mrs. Polarisrider and I were sleeping. The children are nocturnal (wifes side). And my daughter (little feather)who moved out on her 18th birthday said, "Don't worry I don't want their rooms." So let's list the house now and move on the boat before they have a chance to return was my response. Now my question is what do I pay for at my son's wedding? I am thinking a nice gift, the hall and the bar bill. looking for input.

 

[GTL]

And the grooms dinner

 

[indy_500]

I am thinking a nice gift

a 2011 pro rmk 800 for his dad to use!

 

[polarisrider1]

And the grooms dinner

Is that the same as the rehersal dinner?

 

[gary_in_neenah]

I think the rules have blurred over the years. It used to be the Groom's Father paid for the rehersal dinner. One thing for certain is, once it is known that you're one of the fathers of the lovely couple, you'll have people with bills for service coming out of the woodwork.

You'd stand a better chance smearing yourself with raw meat and running through a kennel.

It's really all about the ladies. The Bride, both Mothers, and the Bridesmaids, if you can keep them happy, you'll be doing just fine.

Good Luck and enjoy the day!

My wife says, the Rehersal Dinner usually includes the Wedding Party, Parents and immediate family.

 

[eagle1]

Gee, who's gonna keep the vcr from flashing 12:00 now that there gone




Congrats on the empty nest.

 

[whitedust]

Paid for 3 weddings 1 to go. Groom pays for traditional Rehersal Dinner but paying for wedding open bar would be wonderful. Brides Dad will luv you for sure if you do that. I didn't get any help on 1st 3 weddings & going to be different with #4. Things changing more expense sharing now.

 

[catalac]

Don't forget, throwing a wad of cash at the bachelor party! Yee Haw!

 

[ezra]

unless they already have a house f the wedding give them the 10g for a down payment and a real shot at happiness.a wedding is 5hrs a home is a foundation for life.cant tell you how many of my buds kids get big money wedding 15 to30k and then the kids live in some crap hole rental makes no sense at all oh but they will have pictures to look at what ever.I flipped the bill for most of my wedding and in hind sight wish I would have gotten the house first. heck I dont think I have seen 1/3 of those people sense they came to my wedding 15yrs ago thank god

 

[whitedust]

unless they already have a house f the wedding give them the 10g for a down payment and a real shot at happiness.a wedding is 5hrs a home is a foundation for life.cant tell you how many of my buds kids get big money wedding 15 to30k and then the kids live in some crap hole rental makes no sense at all oh but they will have pictures to look at what ever.I flipped the bill for most of my wedding and in hind sight wish I would have gotten the house first. heck I dont think I have seen 1/3 of those people sense they came to my wedding 15yrs ago thank god

You are right & I offer the money everytime instead of big wedding. They ALWAYS take the wedding then 5 years later say we should have taken the the money.LOL

 

[slimcake]

x3 Whitdust. I have never understood the big expensive wedding. My sister got married last summer and it was like over 30k. Pictures/video ect..... Makes me want to puke. Now they need to borrow money for a down payment on a starter house. My house with a new garage only cost me 50k. What makes more sense???????

 

[favoritos]

unless they already have a house f the wedding give them the 10g for a down payment and a real shot at happiness.a wedding is 5hrs a home is a foundation for life.cant tell you how many of my buds kids get big money wedding 15 to30k and then the kids live in some crap hole rental makes no sense at all oh but they will have pictures to look at what ever.I flipped the bill for most of my wedding and in hind sight wish I would have gotten the house first. heck I dont think I have seen 1/3 of those people sense they came to my wedding 15yrs ago thank god

That is awesome advice.

Although I have to admit that the Raw Meat through the kennel just about knocked me off my chair.

 

[yamahauler]

My dad offered me 5K cash and to pay for wherever we wanted to do a destination wedding. Wife wouldn't go for it and I was pushing hard.

Maybe you can give them a choice. A wad of cash or pay for what you want to pay for at the wedding.

 

[bigmama]

We just had one marry in Sept. We gave a lump sum & when she spent that, they were on their own for the rest. Seemed like that would be the fair way of doing it - we have 2 more to go!

 

[Skylar]

When we told my wife's father we were getting married, this is what he said. " Well, I will give you 2,000 dollars, you are free to spend it on what you want." Cool, we got married at a park, and our great friends threw us one heck of a bachlor/bachlorette/wedding dinner, and we took the money and went to Jamaica for our honeymoon. No regrets from myself, or my wife. 17 years later, still as happy as can be.

 

[joks79]

unless they already have a house f the wedding give them the 10g for a down payment and a real shot at happiness.a wedding is 5hrs a home is a foundation for life.cant tell you how many of my buds kids get big money wedding 15 to30k and then the kids live in some crap hole rental makes no sense at all oh but they will have pictures to look at what ever.I flipped the bill for most of my wedding and in hind sight wish I would have gotten the house first. heck I dont think I have seen 1/3 of those people sense they came to my wedding 15yrs ago thank god

I agree. I have two daughters and when that day comes I would rather do like ezra said and get them started out in life together vs spending money on a wedding that is a few hours long. If I could go back my wife and I would have done Vegas or a destination wedding.

 

[m8man]

Cool Skylar....

I have thought the grooms parents pay for the rehearsal dinner. For us my wife's younger bro is getting married next summer. Both of my inlaws passed away in there 40's so my wife and I raised her brother for a few years. I am wondering if the grooms dinner is enough. That is what I've planned on.

I asked the same question around with some friends and at a minimum they have said the rehearsal dinner and if you can help with the bar. Now I do like the idea of a cash donation and do what ya want with it.

m8man

 

[mjkaliszak]

unless they already have a house f the wedding give them the 10g for a down payment and a real shot at happiness.a wedding is 5hrs a home is a foundation for life.cant tell you how many of my buds kids get big money wedding 15 to30k and then the kids live in some crap hole rental makes no sense at all oh but they will have pictures to look at what ever.I flipped the bill for most of my wedding and in hind sight wish I would have gotten the house first. heck I dont think I have seen 1/3 of those people sense they came to my wedding 15yrs ago thank god

ezra's ... spot on ! Few things are worth the wisdom gained from experience ( that Mom & Dad have ). My wife & I had a small wedding, just family and a few friends, our twins were 4 yrs old ( lot of family pressure about that ) and they were our ring bearers. We paid for everything, we were older when we had gotten married, in our thirty's. Sit them down have a reality talk with them, or better yet... let them read this thread.

We don't think much of the " wedding industry " big cash grab ( IMO ) . At my brothers wedding ( big huge event 250 people ) held at a real prestigous members only club , the elite of society kind , we caught the bar tenders stealing bottles of Top shelf booze and then handing them a 7k bar tab bill this was 20 yrs ago. That turned out to be a stink, I'll tell you ! They actually had gotten married the traditional way, then had kids .... ( I always was the " black sheep " )

Oh Yes, Congradulations is in order...

 

[eagle1]

You guys and your practical wedding ideas are forgetting something.................. there's women involved. LOL

 

[gary_in_neenah]

You guys and your practical wedding ideas are forgetting something.................. there's women involved. LOL

That right there should put an end to this discussion. There's nothing more to be said or learned of the subject.